Eff the environment.

"Sustainable weddings?"

Ya wanna be green? Really? Then sit in a corner of the basement sucking your thumb. And don't exhale, because when you do, you're emitting, omigod, CARBON DIOXIDE! Deadly Carbon Dioxide! Almost as deadly as Dihydrogen Monoxide!

I like the gist of the column, which is "give it a rest already". But, really, there is no need to spend your lifetime reducing your consumption. We are not running out of anything, and societies with higher rates of consumption have cleaner "environments". Consume and be merry. At least, shut up about how you're doing something for the environment by reusing your plastic bags.

Somebody, please, ten or twenty or thirty years from now, when we're sitting sround shivering and worrying about the coming ice age, remember where you heard this. There is no environmental "crisis".